Themes, Schemes & Dreams: Neither your average protest nor your average shit show

Proposition 64, currently being contemplated by the Anchorage City Council, would add sexual orientation to the list of those characteristics one may not legally take into account when considering candidates for housing, education, loans, or jobs. Effectively it would force people to treat gays as regular folks, because still in 2009, we can't trust people to do it on their own. So the City Council has been hearing testimony from citizens, unfortunately many from outside of Anchorage, so as to make the most informed decision possible.

I decided to head down to see what kinds of sights and sounds I'd experience, if for nothing more than a few laughs. Before I went down there I received word that those supporting the passage of Prop. 64 were to wear blue, and those against its passage were to wear red. I made sure to wear neutral colors for the sake of taking as many photos as possible. I drove down there, scrapping my plan to ride my bike on account of some rain. When I got there I was confronted by a sea of red. Many of these kids were wearing red, and wielding signs, obviously printed en-mass, which stated some of their so-called "positions."

Here's Young Maria showing off the "Truth is Not Hate," and the "When the 'Gay Agenda' destroys Civil Liberties' everyone loses!!!" signs. She actually asked me to take a photo of her carrying these. This was typical of the people standing on the way into the library grounds.

Once I got to the library entrance, I was a bit confused. I heard this was going to be a big shit show, and it's just a bunch of people standing around quietly with signs. This group of people near the entrance really preferred the "Truth is Not Hate" variety. It appeared to be an attempt to reach critical mass in an effort to get that message across with some force. Unfortunately, they didn't understand that "Truth is not Hate" doesn't really mean anything. I mean, on one level it makes sense, truth is truth, and hate is hate, so I guess they're not the same. However, they kinda failed to make clear what it was that was so true, and yet not hateful. Alas, they seem to love these signs.

These kids below definitely didn't have any idea what their signs meant, but the held them up for as long as their parents told them to. I think their folks might have dropped them off, and told them to wait there with their signs until they came back from IHOP, probably on some condition that it was the only way they would get allowance. Kinda like doing one's chores.

Child: Mom, can I have my allowance?
Mom: How many hours did you stand outside the library wearing red while holding an anti-gay sign this week?
Child: Six.
Mom: Oh, OK, go ask your father because I gave all my cash to the collection plate.

Although the red shirts had mass-produced signs for the most part, they also had some unique signs such as this clever combination of the Alaska flag and an invocation of Jesus as the state's lord. Too bad the sign loses effectiveness because it's written in the passive voice.

Perhaps they were trying to use an effective marketing strategy by employing a symbol, popular with and familiar to the public, and merging it with their message to make their point more appealing. Then, just like any ad campaign, they surrounded the product with children to try to pull at our heart strings. Whatever their strategy was, the sign was not very creative.

At least not as creative as this sign:Or this one:

If you look closely the sign says "God cured my gayness and my herpes. Ask me how!"

Or even this one:

I love it how religious people continue to complain about morality. Didn't they ever learn that what one deems moral is a really subjective thing? I mean, I personally think that rape is bad, but it's not one of the ten commandments. Plus, where's the evidence for all of this? To me things like the equality of the races, closing the gender gap, and creation of the united nations seem to be pretty strong evidence that morality is not on the decline. But anyway, I digress. Don't get the impression that everyone was in lock step with either the "red" or the "blue" team. There were demonstrators representing a multitude of factions in front of the entrance:

Gay guys who got the memo to wear blue, but were off on their own, trying to personally engage those wearing red, like this guy:

Ironically, his sign appears to be an attempt to show the religious people's...um...I mean red shirts hypocrisy in forcing their kids to come along to the protest to pad their numbers. I too can't wait until one of their kids comes out. It will be a reality check, although not as tragic as when one of them realizes he or she is gay, and doesn't come out on account of their parents.

Additionally there were typical smart asses who cracked me up by making a mockery of the entire event, although their signs did get old eventually.

Here's a perfect example:

As with any protest, there's your typical patchouli drenched wierdo attempting to make some off-topic point about the Middle East (while exercising a serious fashion faux pas-a shirt, tie, a kangol, and one gauge earrings-at the same time):

And then there's always the pro slavery faction:

This kid raised some eyebrows among the red shirts. Apparently many of them repeatedly thump the bible when it's convenient, but they were unaware that there are passages supporting subjugation of fellow humans in the so-called "good book." This guy in the leather jacket got a bit pissed.

Once it was clear that his old "have you ever read the bible?" line would no longer work, he told the kid he was building up bad karma, and that it was all going to come around to bite him in the ass. Karma? Is that really the best he could come up with? The kid walked away with a shit eating grin on his face and agreed to pose for me with his sign.

Things were relatively tame near the entrance, but the demonstrators got a little bit higher energy out on the front lawn near 36th Ave.

There was flag waiving:

Your token liquid dancer:

A DJ (who actually rocked the house):

Notice how even when there's a DJ, some patchouli drenched protester still tries to start a drum circle.

Posing for pictures:

Two totally straight dudes:

Some rebel faction led by the guy in the Mets hat:

Two ladies:

A motorcyclist for Jesus:

Front and back views of his awesome vest:

Some passionate argument:

This lady was mad because she thought it repulsive that men choose to have sex with other men.

This guy was mad because he thought it ironic that a black woman was picketing to have somebody's rights curtailed:

Not much listening going on here:

And this new form of protesting I've never seen before:

I guess rock throwing has gone the way of the dinosaur...

There was also a section for those who dress really uncomfortably:

I never thought I'd be saying this, but: To the father of that 11 year-old kid in the middle, PULL YOUR SON'S PANTS DOWN!! That kids testicles are supposed to drop when his body decides. It's unhealthy for intervening forces to hold those things up.

And to both the adults in this photo: They make larger size clothing for a reason. You don't have to cram your fat ass into the same size you wore when you were in your 20s. Not to mention, let your gay son show his face. He's embarrassed because of what you're making him do...

Maybe the red shirt folk on the curb were uncomfortable because they didn't supply their own music, or maybe it's because of some other reason.

The kid on the left looks ridiculous, and undoubtedly, because of his extremely hiked-up pants, his nuts are perilously close to being rendered sterile.

This girl got so fed up with the homosexual agenda that she just had to step away from the crowd for a breather.

This woman, a.k.a. Kimberly Jong Il (as named by Jason Brandeis), was aboard with the anti-gay stance and felt the love from her fellow red shirts. Unfortunately, she was upset because despite her best efforts she couldn't find fellow supporters of nuclear proliferation.

This guy just looked upset because perhaps this infant took a dump while on his shoulders, or maybe he has a vitamin D deficiency (that's even pale for me). One can't be sure...

And, of course, because it was a protest, there were plenty of people who dress strangely. For some reason though, after seeing all those mopey red shirts, I was, for the very first time in my life, happy to see some hipsters show up. Normally, I would have thought these two were over the top and felt an immediate revulsion, but they were just what I needed.